I love old Black Eyed Peas songs, and I think about the lyrics, “Can you meet halfway… took my heart to the limit, and this is where I’ll stay.” If this isn’t a universal love experience, I don’t know what is. We are often stuck on our past romances to the point where we ruminate on them and allow them to hold us back from the future and present day. Well, it’s time to move on.
With the fresh start of a new year, this is a great moment to reflect on any breakup, ongoing situationship, unrequited love, or flirtation and to say goodbye to what is stagnant, toxic, or simply doesn’t serve you. Don’t try to meet them halfway anymore or give them any more of your time. Move forward.
First, ask yourself why this situation continues to go through your mind.
Maybe you’re stuck on the potential of what you see with that person and navigating the anxiety of a fairy tale.
Maybe they hurt you deeply, or the timing was off, and you continue to feel sad.
Maybe they betrayed you, and you still feel anger.
Maybe you think they’re sexy, and you still want one night with them – lust.
Maybe you’re scared you won’t feel this way again about someone else, or someone won’t want you – fear.
Whatever the reason(s), recognize the situation and the feelings that go with them. Then, ask yourself what it is here to teach you about your future. Maybe you’re now wiser about how you want someone to behave towards you, the words you need to hear while seeing someone, how you do or don’t want to show up in dating, or what your dating non-negotiables are. This awareness will light your path forward.
And as you see your path forward, tap into your faith that a new love is waiting for you.
To quote Diana Ross, “In love, I still believe.”
Want to put your turn your faith in love into a dating action plan? I’d love to talk with you!
Jarryd Boyd, Clarity + Communication Coach 
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