As another year passes by I see how conversations about dating with friends don’t only revolve around the intricacies of asking someone out or the friend zone. It also revolves around the delicateness of hooking up and friends with benefits. Asking someone out, the friend zone and friends with benefits all have their own struggles, but I think friends with benefits is where we can lose ourselves most.
Being a twenty-something (or well anyone at any age) you meet someone with honest intentions of wanting to date them and hopefully be in a relationship one day. Then somewhere early on you learn they only want sex and friendship. Not true romance.
Somehow you’re fine with this.
Except…You’re not fine with this. You have compromised. Except you didn’t compromise. You compromised yourself. You hoped to date them, saw happiness in your grasp and then settled on what they wanted instead.
Excuses are manipulations in dating. Because for the right person, anyone will take a risk, make the time or exert the effort. If someone can’t agree to the honest intentions of your heart, they aren’t meant to be with you in any way. This includes sex.
Even if you both started out only wanting to hook up, know that you’re not a passive passenger on this journey. It’s never too late to make your current intentions known.
Ultimately, we’re sometimes too scared to ask for what we want – what we deserve. But it’s when we ask for what we deserve that we feel uncompromised.