After a short, unplanned hiatus from blogging, I decided to write on love. When I talk about love I mean in the sense of relationships but also friendships. I consider the foundation of love to be trust. Leona Lewis has a song titled “Don’t Let Me Down” and I understand where she comes from with this song, because the hard part about finding love and true friends is not being let down, trusting people, knowing who to trust.
Finding people to love is one of the hardest tasks of our lives. Sometimes the people we think we know the most and can trust are the ones who betray us the most. Also, someone who we have just met becomes immediately trustworthy. How do we know who to trust? We don’t.
I think almost anyone, especially college students, can agree that the hardest part about making new friends is finding dependable friends, the ones that you want to share the truth of you’re having a bad day or amazing day and go into detail about it. This contrasts the “friend” that when they ask, you say the polite “good”, all the while masking how angry or sad you are. I think we all miss the simple days of being able to make friends by being the kid who brings cupcakes to school on their birthday or by liking the latest show, toy, or game. As we get older, we have to assess friendships and wonder, can I trust this person? Can I see us being friends forever? But I think people sometimes are only meant to be in our life for a certain amount of time, so we have to cherish the friendship for the great moments we get from it.
I think we all believe there has to be at least one person out there that we can share the rest of our lives with. When I talk to my friends, one of the most perplexing things is that as young adults, we can all of a sudden get married at a moment’s notice. Not saying we should but it makes the dating game all the more interesting. Should we continue dating someone even though we know they aren’t a good match for us or should we only pursue those that we can possibly see ourselves with? I think we should go on dates and get to know a person, even if at first thought we think we may not be compatible with them. If there is some type of attraction, let’s take a leap of faith and ask that person out. We may get rejected and we may not. In the pursuit of love, we have to overcome fear. J.E. Buchrose said, “”Happiness comes more from loving than being loved; and often when our affection seems wounded, it is only our vanity bleeding. To love, and to be hurt often, and to love again-this is the brave and happy life.” I’m excited for dates ahead. I’m not looking for love but instead trustworthy, dependable friendship that can lead to more.
When dating or looking for friendships we have to take the chance of being hurt. It is a part of finding our roots, of Finding Love.