In elementary school we displayed so much of who we are, how we feel and how we react in different situation. That is why our families worried for us, but also was excited to see how we would turn out.
I wanted teachers to affirm that my hard work was noticed, not for validation as a person but, because it was a sign that I was succeeding. Now I’m dealing with when do you worry about the next step and when do you purely focuse on the present tasks at hand.
As a kindergartener with a crush, I felt so much hope and excitement, wanting to put my best foot forward. Throughout elementary school I was comfortable expressing my emotions with the desire for the feelings to be reciprocated. However, even as twenty-something, I still see that I become a shyer version of myself when I interact with someone I like.
As a child I was fine spending time alone, but I thrived with friendships. This is true still, but it’s different when the closest friendships you’ve developed aren’t right by your side anymore. I’m an extrovert. I enjoy playing into other personalities.
I had the problem of being sometimes overly vocal in my opinion. When I felt like something needed to be said, I was steadfast in wanting to voice it. I like to think that these days I speak to the reality of situations.
I don’t think we lose or completely change from our childhood characteristics. We learn how to sharpen them. We learn to adapt them based on our experiences. Sometimes the world forces us to adjust them.
These past few weeks In Atlanta have made me curious about myself and what’s going on around me. It’s required me to be a touch of bold, but brought forward those childhood characteristics. It’s been unsettling at times, but when I flow with the world around me, when I’m authentic and confident, things go great.